Amsterdam
A guide for dummies to the city where practically everything is allowed.
Amsterdam.
If Terry Pratchett had any real city in mind when he made up Ankh Morpork, it would be Amsterdam. As long as you don't kill or damage anybody (or anything), you're pretty much free to do whatever you want.
Drugs
"When it's legal to buy and use them, it'll probably give less problems then when we make it illegal.". That's about the view of the Dutch government and hell, it works. There's very little (visible, at least) crime surrounding the coffeeshops (places where they sell the drugs). Almost every famous American will loudly proclaim "don't do drugs, kids" when in America, then travel to Amsterdam, and get completely stoned. We've had Britney Spears (who was on a tour) so stoned, that she fell off the stairs of a coffeeshop. When George Clooney and Matt Damon were here for shooting of Ocean's Twelve, I think they spent about as much time smokin' in the coffeeshop as they spent actually doing the movie.
And when they get back to America, it's all "don't do drugs" again.
Alcohol
Officially, we have age limits concerned to drinking alcohol. Practically, you just need one thing to make your drinking legal : paying for it. I've seen kids in bars drinking beer, that hardly reached to my middle (Now, I am tall, but not that gigantic).
Even better, for the underage people, we have Bacardi Breezer. Don't have a clue if it's known anywhere else. Where normal alcohol has an age limit below which you aren't allowed to drink it, the Breezer has a limit above which you shouldn't be allowed to drink it.
And also, drinking it as a guy, instantly makes you gay.
Bikes
An interesting detail about Amsterdam, not known by most tourists.
Bikes are pretty much communal property. Not properly locking your bike is a guarantee that it'll be gone within 5 minutes. Properly locking your bike means putting at least 3 very large and heavy chain locks around it, putting the chain trough the bike and the wheels, and around anything on the street (lampposts, bridges, other bikes -preferably of people you don't know).
Only putting a lock around your front wheel will mean that your bike will be gone -except for the front wheel, which will still be there, with the lock still around it.
'Negotiable pleasures'
The red light district. I don't know much about it's legalness anywhere else in the world. But here, it's legal. It's all centered in one large, red-illuminated area, completely crawling with Japanese tourists.
Now, I wouldn't even consider doing something like this, even if the girls paid me. But it seems they have plenty of business, considering the many broad-smiling (really, from one ear to the other. If they'd smile even more, the top of their head would fall off), ugly old men, that you usually see coming from behind the closed curtains.
Probably something I will never understand, unless I'm gonna end up as a dirty, lonely old man as well .. If I do, somebody please kill me.
Which brings me to a very nice example of the incredible irony in Amsterdam. In one part of red-light district, there's several windows with girls behind them, and then, there's a kindergarden. Really, after several red-illuminated windows, there's suddenly a few windows decorated with children's drawings. I guess they put it there for "professional accidents" of people 'working' around there.
The next best thing would be another street, which is filled with sexshops, and in the middle of it, a Christian Youth Hostel.
Probably coming up, some day :
-Amsterdam, pt. II
Amsterdam.
If Terry Pratchett had any real city in mind when he made up Ankh Morpork, it would be Amsterdam. As long as you don't kill or damage anybody (or anything), you're pretty much free to do whatever you want.
Drugs
"When it's legal to buy and use them, it'll probably give less problems then when we make it illegal.". That's about the view of the Dutch government and hell, it works. There's very little (visible, at least) crime surrounding the coffeeshops (places where they sell the drugs). Almost every famous American will loudly proclaim "don't do drugs, kids" when in America, then travel to Amsterdam, and get completely stoned. We've had Britney Spears (who was on a tour) so stoned, that she fell off the stairs of a coffeeshop. When George Clooney and Matt Damon were here for shooting of Ocean's Twelve, I think they spent about as much time smokin' in the coffeeshop as they spent actually doing the movie.
And when they get back to America, it's all "don't do drugs" again.
Alcohol
Officially, we have age limits concerned to drinking alcohol. Practically, you just need one thing to make your drinking legal : paying for it. I've seen kids in bars drinking beer, that hardly reached to my middle (Now, I am tall, but not that gigantic).
Even better, for the underage people, we have Bacardi Breezer. Don't have a clue if it's known anywhere else. Where normal alcohol has an age limit below which you aren't allowed to drink it, the Breezer has a limit above which you shouldn't be allowed to drink it.
And also, drinking it as a guy, instantly makes you gay.
Bikes
An interesting detail about Amsterdam, not known by most tourists.
Bikes are pretty much communal property. Not properly locking your bike is a guarantee that it'll be gone within 5 minutes. Properly locking your bike means putting at least 3 very large and heavy chain locks around it, putting the chain trough the bike and the wheels, and around anything on the street (lampposts, bridges, other bikes -preferably of people you don't know).
Only putting a lock around your front wheel will mean that your bike will be gone -except for the front wheel, which will still be there, with the lock still around it.
'Negotiable pleasures'
The red light district. I don't know much about it's legalness anywhere else in the world. But here, it's legal. It's all centered in one large, red-illuminated area, completely crawling with Japanese tourists.
Now, I wouldn't even consider doing something like this, even if the girls paid me. But it seems they have plenty of business, considering the many broad-smiling (really, from one ear to the other. If they'd smile even more, the top of their head would fall off), ugly old men, that you usually see coming from behind the closed curtains.
Probably something I will never understand, unless I'm gonna end up as a dirty, lonely old man as well .. If I do, somebody please kill me.
Which brings me to a very nice example of the incredible irony in Amsterdam. In one part of red-light district, there's several windows with girls behind them, and then, there's a kindergarden. Really, after several red-illuminated windows, there's suddenly a few windows decorated with children's drawings. I guess they put it there for "professional accidents" of people 'working' around there.
The next best thing would be another street, which is filled with sexshops, and in the middle of it, a Christian Youth Hostel.
Probably coming up, some day :
-Amsterdam, pt. II
posted by Bartje at 2:46 PM
3 Comments:
lol
ik wist niet dat jij zo goed kon schrijven joh! Ik ben nog niet verder dan amsterdam gekomen, maar ben ook erg benieuwd naar de andere! Kus, manon
Bacardi Breezers are very big in the UK. As are Smirnoff Ice, West Coast Coolers, WKD in three flavours, Archers Aqua in a range of flavours and if boys drink them over here then they are either gay or desperate to get drunk!
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